Madcap motorsport you need to know about

Motoball/Motorcycle Polo

This bizarre ball-come-motorsport goes by two names – motorcycle football and motorcycle polo – and to be honest, until very recently I hadn’t heard of either.

It’s not a new thing, however, as this British Pathe footage from 1936 shows. Reportedly, the sport of motoball originated as early as the 1920s, with one pioneer, Tommy Deadman, founding the Wolverhampton Motor Cycle Football Club, and inspiring a league of similar teams.

In 1928 a nationwide competition in the vein of the FA Cup was set up and teams from across the UK came together to compete in the most unlikely of sports.

It’s as ridiculous as you would imagine – two teams of motorcycle mounted player, jostling together in an attempt to kick a slightly-larger-than-average football towards the opposing goal. Still played today, albeit on much more manoeuvrable bikes, it’s part game, part stunt performance…

Reliant robin racing

Why race on four wheels when you could do three? Sadly, now an extinct sport, Reliant Robin Racing was as hilarious as you would imagine. Featuring grids of the 800cc city cars, it was neither fast-paced nor thrilling, but with their three wheels and incredibly poor stability, it was nothing short of hilarious. Two-wheel teetering moments were frequent, with the diminutive little cars prone to rollovers.

Sadly, it appears that the sport has all but died out. There are potentially still Robin classes at various local banger races, but for now you’ll have to make do with this hilarious clip…

Caravan racing

Another breed of banger racing, caravan racing was made famous by Top Gear in series 22 back in 2015. As with a demolition derby, the aim of the race is not only to complete laps, but also to destroy your own and the opponents’ vehicles.

Grids full of tatty old, roll cage sporting bangers line up on oval circuits, towing caravans that would otherwise be destined for the dustbin, before tearing around the tracks, often losing parts or the whole of the trailer in process. It’s surprisingly popular, and after watching a couple of races, it’s easy to see why…

Moped endurance racing

Name a more British pastime than spending hours aboard an uncomfortable, underpowered moped, monotonously lapping a short track. More often, it will be raining, and breakdowns will be abundant. But with true British flair, we’ll compete whatever the weather, and more often than not sporting fancy dress.

Moped endurance racing exists in two forms – on track and off-road. The former is more serious than the latter – just – but both follow similar rules to real endurance racing, with teams of four sharing the ride over a number of hours.

The Nifty Fifty is perhaps the best known such event in the UK and holds a number of rounds each year at the Route 34 Motocross Park in Winchester. There are various classes for two and four-stroke mopeds of a capacity up to 90cc, and sidecar units up to 125cc. To qualify for entry, your vehicle must have originally been sold as a road going model and feature road-going tyres. It’s perhaps the cheapest way into two-wheel competition, and easily the most hilarious…

The Citroën 2CV 24 Hour Race

In a similar vein to the above, the Citroën 2CV 24 Hour Race is not about lap times, but rather enduring a gruelling 24 hours behind the wheel of one of, arguably, the least suitable vehicle for the task.

Held at Mondello Park, Ireland, until 2003, at Norfolk’s Snetterton until 2014, at Anglesey Circuit in North Wales from 2014-16 and from Snetterton again since, the event is run by the Classic 2CV Racing Club.

Shitbox Rally Australia

The clue’s in the name… Down under, drivers are invited to enter the biannual Shitbox Rally and drive more than 7,000km in a sub-$1,000 AUD (£550) car.

While it sounds like fun in its own right, the Rally has an altruistic motive, and to date has raised more than $23 million (£12.72m) for the Cancer Council charity.

Taking place in Spring and Autumn, the rally tackles some of Australia’s roughest roads, with competitor facing extreme heat, breakdowns and delirious navigation challenges. To make it even more difficult, only front-wheel-drive cars are allowed.  

24 Hours of LeMons

It’s endurance racing, but not as you know it… The 24 Hours of LeMons, held at various race circuits across America, Australia and New Zealand, invites sub $500 USD (£410) cars to compete in 24-hour endurance races. That’s right, you can enter an endurance motorsport race for less than an all-inclusive to Benidorm.

It’s very much an ‘anything goes’ series, and providing the vehicle was street legal when built, any modification is allowed. Teams of at least two drivers, plus crew members, can enter and so join the subculture that has developed around the ridiculous races.

Unusual, time-wasting penalties are doled out by the judges and the so-called Wheel of Misfortune. These include anything from deducting laps if your car is ruled to have cost more than the budget, to metal silhouettes of farm animals being welded to competitors roofs to reduce their aerodynamic efficiency. It’s perhaps the maddest motorsport of them all, and takes grassroots racing to the extreme…