The eight worst car names of all time

Mitsubishi Lettuce

Oh yes, we weren’t joking with the ‘Lettuce’ model in the intro. After years developing a quirky hatchback, Mitsubishi threw all of it out the window by naming the car after the blandest vegetable out there. If they were so determined to name it after a vegetable, surely something as diverse as the carrot or broccoli would have been higher on the list, but no… they went with Lettuce.

Nissan Sunny

On the face of it, the Nissan Sunny doesn’t sound like a bad name. However, when coupled with a model that could be described as anything but ‘sunny,’ that’s where things start to unravel. Perhaps ‘Nissan Overcast with a chance of rain’ would have been more appropriate.

Mitsubishi Carisma

A second appearance for Mitsubishi, but this one leans more toward the optimistic side. To be fair to them, they had done their market research with this car. They wanted a vehicle that was designed for the motorway salesman and if there is one thing that’s missing from that market, it’s charisma. Unfortunately for Mitsubishi, just naming your model Carisma doesn’t suddenly transform a completely uncharismatic car. If that were the case, I’d legally change my name to James Funny King.

Suzuki Esteem

Suzuki must have thought a fast track to respect and admiration was to just name a car Esteem. However, under the 1968 Trades Description Act they should rename it the Suzuki Low-Self Esteem.

Daihatsu Applause

A small part of us loves this name just for the amount of confidence Daihatsu had. On the other hand, it could have also been one of the greatest marketing moves in history. Every motor show the car is on display, the crowd bursts into applause giving the impression that it’s a roaring success. In reality that would quickly come to a halt when they saw it. The Daihatsu Slow-clap would be more appropriate.

Volkswagen Sharan

It’s just a little too close to the VW Sharon, isn’t it? If you’re giving a car a female name, there are quite a few on the list before you get down to Sharon, aren’t there? Now, no offence to all the Sharons out there, but there is a reason why we don’t see many babies being named Sharon these days. Next we’ll be seeing the VW Barbara.

Vauxhall Adam

Along the same lines as the Sharan is the Vauxhall Adam. Yes, we are aware that it is named after the company’s founder, Adam Opel. It’s just unfortunate that he wasn’t called ‘Wolff Opel’ or ‘Maximus Opel.’ On the bright side, they could have been launching the Vauxhall Steve.

Ferrari LaFerrari

Finally we come to the laziest name of all. Ferrari the Ferrari. OK, it’s supposed to be the definitive Ferrari and it is an incredible car, however it just comes across as if the absolute minimum effort has gone into it. At least you soon forget it when you hear the 6.3-litre V12 start up.

So there’s our list. Can you think of any car names worse than ours?